Worth

My heart has been heavy this past week. A beautiful, smart, kind woman that I know publicly announced on Facebook that she’s been struggling with anorexia. In her note she wrote about her conversations with other women and how they often focused on their weight and the latest diet trends.

This post struck me because it made me realize that so many of my own conversations with women lead to this type of dialogue. My heart hurts thinking about how much value we put on our outward physical appearances and how our culture and media try and tell us what beauty is – this unattainable, unrealistic image that very few women possess. And those that do, we often hear about their struggle with anorexia and bullemia as well.

So today, I am vowing to change the conversation. I no longer want to talk about weight.

If you hear me, please keep me accountable and remind me of this vow I am making.

And friends, please know that because I love you, if I am present when a conversation starts, I am going to first, tell you about how much I love you. How much you mean to me. I will tell you about all of the great things I see in you and remind you of your true worth, your true value. And then, if needed, I am going to ask that we change the conversation.

Because I honestly believe that if this image distortion in our culture is going to change, it has to start with us.

WE have to change the conversation.

And if you’re looking for a woman to emulate or need a reminder of what a truly beautiful woman looks like, then she can be found in this passage below. You’ll find that her outward appearance has nothing to do with her nobility or her worth.

^[a]A wife of noble character who can find?
    She is worth far more than rubies.
¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her
    and lacks nothing of value.
¹² She brings him good, not harm,
    all the days of her life.
¹³ She selects wool and flax
    and works with eager hands.
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
    bringing her food from afar.
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night;
    she provides food for her family
    and portions for her female servants.
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
    out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
    her arms are strong for her tasks.
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
    and her lamp does not go out at night.
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
    and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor
    and extends her hands to the needy.
²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
    for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
²² She makes coverings for her bed;
    she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
    where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
    and supplies the merchants with sashes.
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
    she can laugh at the days to come.
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women do noble things,
    but you surpass them all.”
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
    and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Proverbs 31:10-31