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Worry
Ever since my abuse, I’ve been a worrier. This is not something I am proud of, it is a confession. Looking back, I can see how while you are in an abusive environment constantly anticipating the next move of your abuser in a strange way protects you. You won’t be thrown off guard if you
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If you were to die today, where would you spend eternity?
It is a question our culture doesn’t like us to ask. It has become cliche or not PC to discuss such topics. Live life in the moment, indulge in the things of the world. It’s hard for us to even imagine dying sometimes or suffering living in America. So much affluence, so much excess surrounds
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Faith (Part 2)
If you have suffered from abuse, then you have most likely developed certain thought patterns that even if you’ve left your abuser leave you feeling afraid, uneasy, and anxious. Something happens to you when you are living in a constant state of fear, wondering what bad thing will happen next. It changes you, it leaves
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Faith (Part 1)
I’ve been reading a lot about faith lately. For most of my life, I’ve often thought of faith as a mental state of awareness; a belief and trust in God. What I’m finding now is that faith has more to do with our actions rather than with our mental fortitude. Now, don’t get me wrong,
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Beauty
Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. We’ve all heard this phrase before. I grew up repeating it over and over again like a badge of honor, however, nothing could be further from the truth. So often, physical pain heals much faster than emotional pain; words take much longer
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Hope
Music played an important role in my healing process. I would play certain songs over and over again to encourage myself that the circumstances in my life would get better. It is easy to get down, to get depressed during the healing process. So many questions run through your mind…how could I have let that
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Grace
There are so many people I know who have walked away from their faith. Often churches leave scars so deep that it is hard to look at God in any other way than what we’ve seen in others. Church can be a place of healing but it can also be a place of hurt. I
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The Valley
For these past few months, I’ve been in the valley. I haven’t felt like writing anything in this blog, I’ve isolated myself from friends and I’ve spent a lot of time at home, alone. For those of you who know me, you know that I am a very social person and I have a great
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Anger
During my abuse, I was really good at stuffing my emotions inside. Layer after layer of pain, resentment and fear all kept piling up and piling up inside of me. I couldn’t express my emotions. They just stayed there, locked away. But what I wasn’t aware of was that as each day passed, and as
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Belief
Throughout my life, I’ve been to many different churches and have experienced different “versions” of the christian religion. While the fundamental beliefs remained the same, I found a lot of ideological differences that lead me to question certain predetermined beliefs. I remember listening to a man describe his understanding of a particular belief that was
Out of the Grave 